Saturday, December 19, 2009

Your Face Says it All

Do you ever stop and wonder what your face says about you? What expression do you most often wear on your face throughout the day?
Your facial expression says a ton about who you are and how you feel. When traveling or in large crowds such as at amusement parks I enjoy watching people. I enjoy reading other people’s faces. Simply from someone’s face you can often times assess their stress level, happiness, and overall satisfaction with life. Now, flip the coin around. What do others ascertain from reading your facial expressions? If you are like most, your face is drab, stressed out, and overall just plain tired. Thankfully, strangers come and go so their assessment of your mood isn’t all that important in your life.
However, what is VERY important is what your family sees on your face. Do your kids see you smile a lot or do they see a scowl etched between your brow? Unfortunately, I am guilty of this more often than I would like to be. I get so caught up in what I need to be doing, what I should be doing, what I would rather be doing, and more often than not consumed with keeping my kids and house in a somewhat semblance of order. My own problem came crashing down on me one day about a year ago when my oldest asked me what was wrong. Puzzled, I asked why. At which my son replied, you look angry and distant. I immediately apologized and explained that my mind was elsewhere. Later when I had a chance to reflect on that situation, I came to realize that a million things must have been going through my son’s head when reading my expression. I know he must have wondered if it was something he did to make me mad. I felt horrible when I realized this. Of course it wasn’t his fault, nor any of his siblings. And frankly, even if it was I shouldn’t wear those emotions on my face in front of my kids. A momentary look of sadness or disappointment at something they did is one thing but an overall 24/7 look of anger is not what we should portray to our children.
If you find yourself struggling with this try a few of these suggestions:
  • When you catch your child’s eye flash them a genuine smile. This lets them know you are ok and happy.
  • Next time you walk by your child, no matter what you are doing or where you need to be, give them a pat on the head or better yet a kiss on their head or cheek. Even if your child is involved in something like homework, playing a video game, or reading a book this thoughtful and loving action lets them know you care and cared enough to take a second out of your day to express affection. Often times we get so caught up in our day that we forget to show our children enough affection.
  • Write your child a love note. Put the note under their pillow or in the medicine cabinet where they will find it in the morning. This is yet another way to show your child you are proud of them, you love them, and they are important to you. If your child is not reading yet then draw simple pictures on the note, the message will be the same.
  • Get rid of the scowl even if you think they aren’t looking, because trust me there are always looking at you.
Wearing a smile, warm eyes, and happy body posture will go a long way in creating a loving and happy environment in your home. Kids should not be worrying about their parents mood, they will though if you always look mad or sad. It is kids’ nature to think that they in someway caused your sour mood which in turn raises their stress levels. Please make a concerted effort this week to brighten up the expression on your face, your kids will appreciate it.



1 comment:

  1. I just dropped in from THL and this post caught my eye. Just what I needed to hear. I printed it out to remind me. Thank you!

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